Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Why Coexist When We Can Respect Instead


I pulled into the Dunkin Donuts drive through to get my 3$ cup of iced caffeine (black of course) and right there in front of me was one of those cars (usually a Subaru, sometimes a Volvo) with a “Coexist” bumper sticker on the back. I always take extra notice in the drive through when the official tag of the uber-elitist progressive, is on the car in front of me, because in this part of the country they usually drip sickening disdain for those that they feel are beneath them. Dunkin Donuts employees almost always fit that bill, so I knew I was probably going to be throwing an extra few coins into my tip. I still like to see these people at work so I can judge them properly and categorize them into the various genre of sub-human excrement that only a judgmental prick such as myself can do justice to.

Now of course the person in front of me was a douche bag, and they did drive the employee to near tears as they often do, but it was the reasoning this time that really amazed me. It appeared to be the “Apple Pay” on their iPhone which created the fracas that required the enlightened proggie in the car in front of me to shine on. I watched the poor girl try to scan the iPhone app so that it could charge them for their small (who the Hell orders a small?) coffee or what not, and it just wouldn’t work. The patron refused to accept this and even went as far as to snatch the scanner out of her hand and try to make it work themselves. Unfortunately their overly educated brain couldn’t seem to get the whole thing to work either. I of course have been sitting here behind one car for almost 15 minutes at this point.

The fact of the matter is the average person goes batshit crazy whenever their new technology doesn’t work for them the way they would like it to. I was rather amazed as I had the time to wonder if “Apple Pay” was actually something that the world desperately needed to begin with, much less to lose you mind over when it doesn’t work. I was about ready to get out of the car and go pay for the person’s small (seriously, why did you bother with all this for a small?) coffee, but the person was now tossing pennies and dimes from their ashtray into the window. How about pulling out that there credit card you linked to the Apple Pay, Mr. Smiley? Then of course they tried to get their all wheel drive to spin it’s tires (epic fail) as they bolted out of the drive through. A new low in douchebaggery.

The poor girl was near tears as they usually are when the better than elitist gets done with them. Let's face it, but the coexist bumper sticker is only a way to say, "I am smarter than religious folks" and has nothing to do with coexistence. I didn’t really have anything to say, but I made sure as I always do that I just gave a little extra in the tip. I remember one of my proggie cousins who gave me the lecture one day about how they get paid, you don’t have to tip them. The same person who would cry and whine that they should get double minimum wage, but as usual that is because he thinks ideas like that are great if someone else is paying for them. I on the other hand grew up in the services industry (just like most of my cousin's family did) and I will always gladly tip for services, and always respect people who can smile when dealing with people. I did of course remember how good it felt to tell him that as long as there were people like him out there someone had to reinvigorate the hope of humanity in others.