Friday, July 25, 2008

Livin' With Evils's - Volume 32

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It has been a long hard week patrolling the streets of Megalopolis, but our favorite super villain turned super hero, the man with no plan, the Caped Pervader, the one and only Superdaddyman, keeps ever underfoot of those that would be out to create chaos. This summer he has been doing an internship program for another once diabolical {still is} fiend who is in need of a few extra high school credits, and perhaps can find herself to become a mere fraction {which is far superior to most} of the great warrior of good which is known as the Superdaddyman. Although she lacks the technical skills of “cuteness” that the vicious evils’s known as Captain ADHD, and Imtoocutus have to real in the single mommies for our hero, Lazius Boycrazius does have a certain level of intangibles that can be of use to the Superdaddyman at this time {she brings him Ice Coffees when she gets off work} and perhaps can finally fulfill her destiny as the Caped Pervader’s sidekick, Superdaddydaughter!

Now at this time it may be a tall order for her, as it is hard to live in the shadow of the greatest super hero known to Megalopolis, but her training has been going merely pathetic, as opposed to just plain awful. She was able to point out one of the women that has a propensity to bend over a lot at the hostage swap site {bus stop} for the other two evils’s. Although not completely a bad looking woman that she had spied out for our crime fighter, she was saddled with the look of “hooked on welfare” and never wears skirts. Two very bad signs, but of course this is a start for any up and coming crime fighter in this fair city. In time the Superdaddyman should be able to mold her into a proper look out for those things that are important. In the mean time the Superdaddyman may have to teach her how to drive the Superdaddymobile, so that he can assess all of the situations without crashing it while fixated on a particularly interesting subject.

Another attribute that the burgeoning Superdaddydaughter has which can probably be honed into a very valuable asset is that she does laugh at just about every stupid thing that comes out of the Superdaddyman’s mouth. Many years of unsuccessful dating and marriages have taught the Superdaddyman that this is an extremely hard quality to find in anyone, much less a sidekick. Her youth and high school status of course create a whole new level of issues though as she can fall into a relatively harsh fit of “the giggles” that are almost impossible to tame. On one occasion when the interning Superdaddydaughter was completely enthralled in her own silliness, the Superdaddyman made one of his rare slip ups and muttered “Holy McCrackflurries Batman” which completely sent her over the edge. Aside from the accidental blasphemy of uttering the name of a lesser super hero, it rendered the girl wonder almost useless in the interrogation of the prisoners after they had been released into our custody. It does appear to be almost impossible to bring evils’s who have spent the day running around like lunatics at the detention center {camp} when the faithful {oh that even sounded stupid on this end} sidekick, is incapable of doing anything but slap her knee and mutter “Holy McCrackflurries Superdaddyman!”

Now of course you still have to worry about your new sidekick’s blithering ideas as well, but then again Megalopolis wasn’t built in a day, was it? She had been assuming that if she were to bring the evils’s McFlurries that she could make them happy, and keep them quiet for the ten minute drive from the drop off area to the Casa di Evils’s. This we would assume comes with age and superior mental abilities like the Superdaddyman often displays. {damn that only seemed like half a compliment for some reason} Through the reason of a Superhero the Superdaddyman knows full well that nothing is going to keep a 7 year old female evils’s happy or quiet, up to and including a X-box and a gag. He’s tried both of these in the past and it was never a pretty picture. The Superdaddyman also understands that no 7 year old female evils’s is going to allow {by vow of death} her 9 year old male evils’s inmate to enjoy his or be silent either. The scenario started by her being infuriated that Lazius Boycrazius had gotten her the wrong “type” of McFlurry. The Superdaddyman knows that whipped ice cream and sugary substance tastes the same regardless of the sugary substance, but then again he is still on the Superdaddydiet and might just be grumpy. Upon refusal of eating said whipped ice cream with sugary substance, she then proceeded to do something to make her happy, also known as pinching her brother. This then led to a tirade of anger and yelling from him and a slap, then followed by screaming from her. Curses! Foiled again!

Of course the true meaning of why none of these tricks of hers seem to be working is because she had been getting these bribes for them too frequently. The Superdaddyman took his new assistant, to the undersecretary, of the second cousin, of the roommate of a sidekick and explained to her the error and why it appears to be none functional. In all hopes she would simply be able to store this information in the event that some day she would have to take over in the shoes of the Superdaddyman, he simply assumed that the information would evaporate from her head within a few days. As a 15 year old wanna be crime fighter she probably should have rolled her window up, so that it wouldn’t fly through her ears with such veracity, and perhaps she wouldn’t have repeated the same mistake the next day. Of course the windows were down, and the same scenario repeated itself the next day. For all of the insurmountable mental abilities of our favorite crime fighter it appears that he doesn’t seem to learn from his own mistakes sometimes too. Like especially, don’t ever invite your enemies into your fold ;8o)

Other Crap This Weirdo Publishes... Mental Notes & Random Musings {Daily Blog} The Crow's Nest {The Homepage of Jeremy Crow} Jeremy Crow on Multiply {For Community Types} Blogaholics Anonymous {E-Mail Blogging Group} Itching For Coffee {Community Blog}

Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, screw ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! .. Jeremy

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