Saturday, June 28, 2008

Things You Learn When you Marry a Loser - Volume 3

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The truth, the whole truth, but how would I know the truth? I really hate writing about the gloom and doom of my poor decision making skills, but sometimes it is the most pertinent things within my life. In many circumstances, writing about these things and owning them often seems to relinquish the issue at hand. All except for one glaring issue to which I have come to the conclusion will remain with me for about ten years and two months. It appears that the Mother of all the Evils’s {MAE} decided it was finally time to start calling again, and as usually she had taken a long enough break from it to leave me totally unprepared. The good news in this regard is that she may have been relatively harmless in her proclamations, and might have actually turned that corner into being the negative power of example that she was created to be.

She was armed with her usual weapons of guilt, and lies, but perhaps something had happened along the way, because she was totally incapable of ensnaring her greatest ally in the war of the BPD {Borderline Personality Disorder} who would be Captain ADHD. It’s central for all terrible mothers {take notes if any terrible mothers are out there reading this} to clamp an iron fist around the hearts of all of your sons. A boy will unconditionally love his mother and fall for all of her shit regardless of how horrible they are as a human being. I have many years of research in this department as I watched my own son swallow down every table spoon of shit his mother feeds him, and of course my own recollections of childhood from my own mother. In her case it lasted about 15 years until I finally realized that it all was a lie, I was nothing more than ill treated property, and I probably hated her. I don’t recommend allowing this to happen, or to allow yourself to get to this point, but then again it beats the alternatives.

She did try all of the games. Mommy loves you but daddy doesn’t let her see you. The boy had finally been let in on this ploy by his older sister and responded by telling her that she could see him every Saturday, but he had given up on her coming. She started working the angle that she was sick and couldn’t drive out to see him but his daddy is too mean to bring him out to see her. He parried that thrust with another gem about how his daddy had to drive to work every day, and shouldn’t have to spend his day off driving out there. He added that since she never seems to have a job that she should have come out to see him before she got sick. I have a feeling that didn’t go over too well, but she tried another tactic of telling him that she bought another snake. This managed to hold his attention and even seemed to give him that much needed excuse to tell her all about his new cat. After a while he realized that she didn’t really want to talk about him and even handed the phone to his sister saying, “Why don’t you tell Imtoocutus about yourself, I’m too busy,” and she’s probably been crying to any friends she has left about it all night since.

I, of course, still won’t talk to her. I actually blame it on having too much self respect at this point. I talked to her sister about her new issues, and she assures me that she is not dying. Her new con {in theory, it could be true, but let’s get real here} involves her having extreme vertigo every time she gets into an automobile. She states that it is an after effect of having her ovaries removed from having HPV, and most of the people she has around her has fallen for it. Of course it takes some really stupid and/or gullible people to be around her anyway. I still admit whole heartedly that being married to her for 4 years made me the stupidest and most gullible of them all, but I am recovering from that still. I researched HPV to at least have the facts that it doesn’t cause this vertigo she whines about, and probably wouldn’t have started driving the kids out to see her anyway. It has always been about getting the kids out to her place anyway, no matter what the courts say. It’s a simple ploy really because then that way you can fill your place with everything their heart desires {within reason of what people will get for you so that you can fight your evil ex-husband who stole them in the first place .. lack of job always places this caveat on your plans} and then send them home to hate their father for it all. The ploy at least has kept her from having to go to the grocery store and buy your own food {her parents created that monster so they can feed it for all I care} or even go and pay any of her bills. The state of Maine has 3 social workers to each citizen for a reason.

She must be getting really crabby by now though since her new disease has forced her to be with the same boyfriend for quite a while now. Living in the middle of nowhere in Maine is great for being a lay about, but it is a horrible way to keep your inhibitions filled. Now that she can’t hitch rides to the bars she hasn’t been able to find replacements for the guy she has been living with, and her BPD doesn’t allow her to leave one man without the other one already in hand, so she is probably a prisoner of her own realm finally. She has been resorting to using her first husband as her pity post {tidbit from my daughter, since it is her biological father} which means that her habits have probably been supplemented by him, and that always kills two birds with one stone. It gives her the financial strength she needs to not be productive, and it gives her a man to cheat on her man with who is usually willing to drive for it while he is at work. My plan to finally get my oldest daughter into a drivers license so that she can troop the kids around to see their mother if she wishes appears to be falling apart since she didn’t seem to keen on that when she was explaining her bio parents playing doctor to me. Teenage girls love their drama and all, but then again you never actually see soap operas that take place in a trailer park do you?

The rainbow flying over the storm cloud in all of this appears to be that she is having a very hard time creating the chaos that she desires in the kid’s lives to prove that they are her property. My mother used to be the master of that, but my father was too weak to place firm enough restrictions on what she did when she came blowing into town every two years. My ex is NOT allowed on school property, or to see my son’s psychiatrist or therapist, so she can’t create the painful situations my mother did. It might have been one of the only gifts I could have given them that they will never know about if I have my way. As she has just started calling them again it should last for about 2 weeks, and that would then allow her to retreat back into her little world where her friends can console her for being mistreated by us all for the next 3 months of no contact. If it stays as null as it was yesterday when she called I may not need the entire 3 months to repair the damage that she causes, but by the way my son worked out the riddle of “what does an unemployed woman who doesn’t visit her kids need a 300 dollar snake for” by himself last night, I think she may have finally crossed that line that took me 6 years longer to reach in my own childhood. Then again, like I have always pointed out about how I didn’t get diagnosed with ADHD because I didn’t have two sisters making it worse, I also didn’t have two sisters to help me realize that my mother wasn’t worth my tears either. ;8o)

Other Crap This Weirdo Publishes... Mental Notes & Random Musings {Daily Blog} The Crow's Nest {The Homepage of Jeremy Crow} Jeremy Crow on Multiply {For Community Types} Blogaholics Anonymous {E-Mail Blogging Group} Itching For Coffee {Community Blog}

Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, screw ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! .. Jeremy

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