Friday, February 23, 2007

A Tale Of Two News Stories - Volume 4

It doesn’t really amuse me anymore what I am seeing in the news, and more over as self righteous as I can be, I found myself feeling rather sorry for a few people the last week or so. I mean it’s a tale of two bimbos in effect, and I know that everyone is getting sick of hearing about it all on the news but I want to interject a few things here because I can and I happen to have a bit of a different expertise on these sorts of things than most people do. I know that most of you have heard about the passing of Anna Nicole Smith, and like me your first reaction was probably, “Well that’s what happens,” and then along the way it turned into “Enough already, she was nothing more than the lowest common denominator,” but as I find myself feeling rather guilty for forgetting a bit about myself, I shall blend it all into something that one would not expect from me.

It actually was today on the radio I was listening to stories of another couple of losers in the form of Britney Spears and Madonna, that it really sort of hit me, what is wrong with the world today, and I had to drag out the old soap box and remember where I came from as well. I don’t talk about it as much as I used to, but many of you might be reading about it in my old blogs as I post them about, that I happen to be a recovering alcoholic. Its part of me and it shapes who I am immeasurably despite the fact that I just past 17 years sober last July. It also was a part of Anna Nicole’s make up but in the form of serious drug addiction, and now we are seeing it in Britney Spears as well. The difference between me and these two is the fact that my drinking turned me into a cursed object and not a blessed gem, or a Golden Goose to put it a bit differently. With that said I see it in the headlines from that trial over what is going to happen with Anna Nicole’s body, and we are only seeing the beginning of what will happen over the custody of her baby.

The sad reality of it all is that the men that surrounded themselves around Anna were nothing more than a pile of sick and decrepit scumbag gigolos that were sucking the marrow from her soul the entire time they did everything they could to keep her a train wreck. They killed the Golden Egg laying goose because they couldn’t stop feeding off of it. Without her fallen diva status their meal ticket ended and now you are looking at a baby that is a few weeks old that has already been granted a death sentence before her first birthday. The scum that are fighting it out over who gets that Liza Minnelli style prize, are going to take her and turn her into the same type of doomed from birth tragedy that we seen in many of the second generation death princesses out there, only worse based on the fact that the men around this baby are already proven to be death lords, when many of the other ones have at least had the opportunity to be brought up better in a lot of their cases. I see Britney Spears being dead by the time she is 30 because she doesn’t have a single positive influence around her anymore and now that her core audience {the child molesters} have moved onto younger idols, she is left with nothing but “yes” people, to feed her to the headlines she gets.

Now as I said I feel for her really badly because there is no way out of this sick cycle carousel until she can be separated from the people who make a living off of her falling apart. The hair shaving incident has created a lot of wonderful rumors and all, and her skipping out of rehabs is funny, but there isn’t a single person on this planet that is within arms reach of her to tell her that it is wrong and give her a bit of tough love. Here is where my heart goes out to her in the sense that as self righteous as I am, and no matter how much I want to justify the misery of the overly and undeserved “famous” in this country she probably will not run out of money before she finally kills herself. That is a scary proposition as I look at it because I would have killed myself under those circumstances as well. We are having a lot of fun at the expense of Anna Nicole and talking about what a circus it has become, and how she was never more than X – Y – Z but nobody has stopped to talk about anything we can learn from this, and we aren’t going to learn from this. It’s sad in a way as we are gearing up with our popcorn for the next train wreck, and I see this and say, “Oh My God, my daughters worshipped that train wreck for a time,” just like I am certain that Britney must have idolized some other train wreck before her too. Who knows where her kids are right now, but I am sure that most people don’t really care, other than to beat her down with the info.

I am sure that some people look at Madonna and consider her to be a wonderful role model but despite all of her gerrymandering about parenthood these days, does anyone really take her seriously? I mean we are made to believe that she has some sort of influence, because she is allowed to buy babies and then turn it into a humanitarian effort, but her parenting skills for God’s sake? What we see is the woman that very proudly displayed her ability to sleep with every “has been” from the 80's and 90's, and not a wonderful parent, and that is just a fact. I think personally it all gets clouded in the belief that times have changed that much, but it all really is as created as she was coming out of Julliard, and nobody is willing to let it wither on the vine. When does she see her children darting around the world telling everyone how to live their life? Most people forget that she had children. This isn’t being bitter, it’s just the reality that she is the ONLY pathetic role model left from the 80’s that is still held up to this sort of veiled esteem and I don’t believe for a minute that anyone actually cares what she has to say. I bet Britney idolized this woman at one time, and someone is still whispering it in her ear that she will be her, and I could have sworn I saw the two of them kissing in a publicity stunt, before she started totally losing it. Will the insanity never stop? You laugh, but this is a typical role model to women from my generation, and a bit younger, trying to continue to be so.

I was given a chance at one time based on the fact that I didn’t have anything left. I was standing outside of my own apartment after trying to kill someone, and was with absolutely nothing in the entire world except my own misery. I didn’t have any creature comforts to take my mind off of what was wrong with me, and I definitely didn’t have another human being in this entire world who was going to assist me in getting through my own misery. I had totally run out of people that I could morph myself into at the end to be what I never really was. I didn’t quit drinking because I wanted to get sober I quit drinking because I wanted the pain to stop. No more, no less, and the choices that were given to me at the time were drink and be miserable, or stop drinking and perhaps get better. People like Britney Spears and Anna Nicole Smith are not given any realistic goals to shoot for in the “better” arena what so ever. They are convinced that they are at the top at all times, and because of that they will never be allowed to reach a bottom. One of them died for it and questionably killed one of her children already from it, and the other one is not long for this world, and her children are doomed as well. Try to remember that when you are enabling someone who is killing themselves through whatever measure they use, and try to at least have pity for all of the people they take with them. That’s hopelessness I will hopefully never have to endure, and my children who have never seen their daddy drunk will hopefully never have to recover from as well. For this I am eternally grateful, and will actually say a prayer for Anna Nicole’s rest, and Britney Spears life, because I understand better than I wanted to believe I did ;8o)

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Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, screw ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! .. Jeremy

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