Monday, December 25, 2006

The Jeremy Crow Christmas Countdown 2006 #1


So now another Christmas has befallen us. Another year older, not much wiser, and I am bout to go upstairs to watch the lunatics running the asylum for their one day a year like they always do. It’s kinda sad really because the only thing I really find myself closer to is that magical day that I get to put the golden footprint on Imtoocutus’s ass {11 years and 8 months exactly but who’s counting} and start running for wherever. The kids are most likely staying over at their grandparents tonight so I am planning to go see that James Bond movie I have been dying to see after I drop them off, and now it is just a matter of waiting for the family to show up. I’m writing this while I am cooking all of the bacon and sausage for the traditional “Jeremy Cooks Us Food … Ug … Food Good” thing that I do for Christmas, and will probably finish the rest after I drop the kids off.

Needless to say I am out of that monster depression that always leads me into the Christmas holiday, and now I am sort of just biding my time for today to get over with. I reread the last three blog entries {my Christmas Story for this year} again and I am actually kind of impressed with it, so that is a good thing. I haven't lost it completely yet. Who knows what is coming next but it probably won’t be that bad. Last years Christmas was probably the most subdued I had had in a long time, but during that one I was of a different mindset then I am now believe it or not. It’s kinda funny but at this time last year I had woken up to see that my blogs were in the top 5 on Myspace for a solid week {and I didn’t know yet that it was going to be number 1 on Christmas day itself} as well as on 360. Course I didn’t realize either that I was going to get my account banned on Yahole 360 {even if I was trying like a bastard LOL} and going to have a total sick of it all meltdown on Myspace within the next month either. It’s funny how these things work themselves out in the end. I did decide a couple of days ago that I was going to start reposting a lot of my writings here just for shits and giggles since I am still trying to fix all of them on my own website. The sound of footsteps, I shall be back to finish this after I drop the kids off in the Peoples Republic of Maine later.

Well it’s amazing how things change in my world as I just got back from East Bum Maine, and uploaded the photos to my home page and to CherryTap. The kids decided to have a mutiny about staying at their grandparent’s house and now they are coming back tonight. This of course places the tag of “Whenever” on it which cancels the movie {even though as I come to think of it the whole “sitting at a movie alone” thing was probably equally as pathetic as sitting here all night waiting for the kids to get home} that I was really hoping to see. Ah the life of a single father who married into the family from Deliverance. EX3 showed up without her significant other because apparently they were having a Tift about whose family they were going to spend Christmas with. Now mind you she chose MY family and brought her family along, which I guess makes us pretty special but you can see it in her eyes that she wasn’t happy about spending a second Christmas without her sig. This of course brings up that whole sickening complex of a man that has to feel sorry for a woman who divorced him because she misses the woman that she left him for. Actually never mind that is very Andy Warhol and rather amusing as I read it.

My Uncle had shown up without his wife which is rather strange so she must be going through one of those spells where she finds people scary, which happens quite often but she’s been a lot better lately. The cousin I hate {the actress … yeah!} my other aunt, and her husband who I introduced to her because she was my oldest child’s Godfather showed up extremely late as usual. A bit of background is as follows. The oldest child being not mine biologically or even by adoption when I introduced the two of them, and then married each other after I had finally broken free of the Clampits out in Maine, and thus placing me back in that clan. Actually that confused me too don’t worry about it. I did actually inherit him in the divorce though and he’s a very good guy and treats my aunt like a fairy princess which was what she needed after a horrible 20 year marriage to one of those men that doesn’t like sports but likes to hunt {meaning the classic definition of an ubra-asshole} and I have been pretty accepting of it all. I didn’t fall into last years trap of waiting for them so not only were the kids toys all unwrapped but put away by the time they had gotten here. Score one for the Superdaddyman!

Everything actually went quite well for the most part and I actually got everyone out of here and was on the road to take the kids to Maine a half hour early, and had at least negotiated that they make the drive back with them. The ex wife was drunk when I got there and was wearing her sluttiest little skirt with the tops of her thigh highs showing {and yes I noticed having gone well over a year without a date, and she is still very hot} and I managed to avoid any of the drunken hugs {score 2 for the Daddyman … Hi Five!} while escaping out the door. Nothing like an hour and a half drive home though to really make you think. It’s one of those rare times that I am alone, yet just as lonely as when I am not. I know it’s the whole ritual of the belief that I have all the love in the world as my kids force it upon me but I do spend a ridiculously long time in limbo waiting for everything to simply pass. I don’t exactly know why or when I lost that ability to seize each moment as it was so worthy of being lived but I have and it just makes me wonder some days. My Mojo is in there I just need to find it.

Well with that said I am going to go assemble the things I got for the kids without them pawing at them while I try to do it, and then hopefully sit down and create something mildly artistic. I had to seriously give up on all of that during the hell weeks leading up to Christmas and I am sure that it hasn’t helped my attitude at all. I have my 2 Dunkin Donuts gift cards, my carton of smokes, and a can of cashews that I got for Christmas to get me through the next few days, and I don’t have to go back to work for another week and two days. What more could anyone want? Don’t ask I’d probably start a list ;8o)