Thursday, February 2, 2006

Mental Notes - Yahell 369 Edition - He's Back ... For Now

The Yahoo! 360° team has sent you this message. {wow, the Yahoo 360 team is a computer ... that explains a lot!}

Welcome to Yahoo! 360°. {why thank you ... ya missed me huh?}

We're glad you're here. {ah yes ... This Too Shall Pass}

Now it's time to jump in and start making the most of Yahoo! 360°. {don't you worry about that I already have picked out the people I am going to stalk and harass, I know what you idiots look for in a user!} Any and all of these should get you started (and don't forget to bookmark your page): {why, it may not even be here tomorrow? ... Well ok, I'll do that if you promise to excuse my language}

  • Post a picture of yourself. Smiling, scowling. Looking adorable. Being you. {your dick in a hot dog bun, pictures of nude kids, anything except a woman dressed in something scanty ... um actually don't BE a woman we hate that here too!}
  • Create a blog. Write about whatever suits your fancy. Add pictures. {again no female pictures, dressed or otherwise we hate those! Be sure that you don't report people for things, we may come after you for it!}
  • Upload photos. Family. Friends. Kids. Goofy pet pics. Anything. {damn! How many pictures do you think I have of my dick in a hot dog bun, and my children nude? You people sure demand a lot out of me!}
  • Post a Blast. One idea, all your friends. Things start to happen. {just make sure it doesn't have the word FUCK in it, damn they hate that!}
  • List things you like. Share your recommendations. {What if I like scantily clad women?}
  • Invite friends and family. So they can see what you've shared. {My family hates me enough without subjecting .... um .... yeah great idea ... I can kill several birds with a very small rock ... Thank You Yahoo ... You ROCK!!}

And remember, you can control exactly what is seen by whom. {so if I don't want the fucktards at 360 seeing it, where do I click??}

So start your page. Where it goes is all part of the adventure. {yeah you could say the same thing about what happens when you flush a toilet ... it's pretty close actually}

-- The Yahoo! 360° Team {nice computer ... nice!}

PS Don't be shy about giving us feedback -- there's a Beta Feedback link on every page of the product. We want to make Yahoo! 360° a great experience, and you're in the perfect position to help. {here's some feedback for you ... where's my fucking money you assholes!!!}

See Ya Next Week ... ~J