Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Coda 2 - You Have Been Invited To Kiss My Ass

Ah yes, it’s time for a little third rail therapy today boys and girls, as I am going to be break dancing on the son of a bitch today. A few of you that love to point out my uncontrollable ego will have a field day with this one, and let me just say that it is going to be one of THOSE kind of blogs today, so please apply the “obscenity filter” of choice, or go the fuck away.

Well MySpace decided to put me back into the top tens again, so with that comes a certain level of responsibilities, which include telling all of you what it is actually like to be in the top tens. I know that quite a few of you know already, but I am the one to tell the truth about it … OUT LOUD!!! This of course will create some of that stomach churning good times that many have come to expect from me once in a while.

The first thing I noticed, but didn’t know it had to do with my top ten rankings was that people were showing up and subscribing to my blog out of the blue. Don’t get me wrong, this is a very cool thing because with that I met a few whicked cool people who’s blogs I in turn subscribed to {because I am like that} and am very thankful for. You all know who they are because basically my little gang of thugs that I brought over with me from “the scary place” all integrate very well with whomever happens to be hanging around which is yet another good thing. Score one for the good guys I always say, but you know me, let’s start chronicling the silly and sad.

Almost immediately after that I started getting the “You have been invited to be a reader of INSERT NAME HERE’s blog” which at first was at best mildly amusing. The first one being that “Your Leader” guy, and damn if he wasn’t persistent. Myself and the ubra-assholes that I hang out with in IMs would simply start picking on him and making jokes about it all, but then just about every day I was in the top 5 of any given list I would get a couple of invites … the one behind me … and the one in front of me. This was starting to get a little more than amusing; it started to look like a toy to play with.

So in typical fashion, I would start doing science experiments with those that would invite me to be a reader of their blogs. I would say suuuuuuuure, then go over and do one of two things … leave a comment to upstage their blog, or leave a comment at the very least to see what they do next. Coming from The Don Mc school of blog comment upstaging I am pretty good at this, and would find amusement as people would place their comments under me instead of the person who actually wrote the blog. You all knew I was a prick anyway, so this should come as no surprise. Then after a few days when I saw that they didn’t subscribe to me, they would be un-ceremonially “dumped” from my subscribe list. The fact of the matter is this people … those that ask you to subscribe to their blogs are simply trying to feed off of you, and I for one find it insulting.

Now whether it is a question of stealing others readers, or getting another good commenter, or whatever it is I have realized something from my exodus from Yahfuckum 369, that many of the bitchy assholes who stepped up in my shit for living out my fantasy life in blog {and probably haven’t noticed one bit that I gave up my 100’s of comments a day, and did so months before Yahshit deemed me useless to them and killed my account}, and that is this, I know what it all is and what it is all NOT, a lot better than they think. I actually love most of the people who comment on my blogs like family, and if it weren’t for the family that I get comments from in this stupid thing I would have given it up a long time ago.

I have been a man of epiphanies lately as the epiphany I had yesterday told me to stay out of blogs all together and write my damn book, because there is no nobility in being poor white trash, with an audience. I need to tone down the amount of time I spend blogging and start working on being rich and famous {giggling as I write that} with my writing. Today’s epiphany came from of all places listening to The Howard Stern show, {which I hadn’t listened to since 86 when I lived in New York}, but on a whim I turned to Sirius 100 and low and behold it was Henry Hill.

For those of you who don’t know who Henry Hill was, he was the man that the movie “Goodfellas” was based on. He actually reminds me a lot of these blog Gods in the fact that he was the biggest flavor of the month in “look at me society” back in the 70’s, and in the end he was on Howard Stern today admitting that there is a video tape of him being butt raped by 2 hillbillies from Nebraska, who he claims drugged him and video taped the whole thing as they violated him with a purple dildo. Think about this for a minute, and when you regain your composure from the entire bout of laughing, try to realize how this all ties in.

I took yesterday off, and the messages of “How Are You Doing? Are You OK?” totaled 2! The messages of “You have been invited to read INSERT NAME HERE’s blog” totaled 9! They are damn lucky that I don’t have time these days for more R&D so I simply deleted them. I am doing well … Thank you ;8o)

Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, fuck ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! ..

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Jeremy Fink and The Crow's Nest