Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Musical Methadone & Mental Masturbation - Volume 6

So Superdaddyman started his evening off quite normally at Pink Mafia Headquarters {PMHQ}, but the song of the evening was The Hanukah Song, due to all of the blog smashing that Superdaddyman had been bringing to all of the good little girls and boys throughout the land of 360 {yeah muahahahahaha}, and it makes Superdaddyman wonder why he has any friends at all. I had never realized how in the Musical Methadone department, how easily you can drive people nuts with this song. Sneaking up behind coworkers “And look at Randy bein’ dum, yanno he’s such a fuckin blond!” … The possibilities were endless!

The best part though of this night seriously for Superdaddyman was the sheer delight that he brought to his King, the man who just last week has stretch wrapped, shrink wrapped, and vacuum sealed the Superdaddyvan, after placing about 40 crawfish in it, and should be terrified of retribution. No he cared not, as his giddiness over the knowledge that this is officially the last 4 days that he will ever have to deal with ME, made him practically masturbate all night as he walked around with a huge smile on his face. Whatever I did was not going to phase him one bit, and the thought of pranking him actually lost it’s luster with all of his non-caring over such evil that I could have wrung down upon him. Even getting my precious updates on the Squeeler killin from The Artist Formerly Known as Polly Pureheart {TAFKAP} could not bring Superdaddyman to the proper state of giddiness that a good assault on Good King Paco Taco, would have brought, but you kiddies know that something else will always come along to change all of that, now don’t you?

TAFKAP of course found it amusing to bring up that our newly adopted parents are probably miserable over the misfortunes of their chosen football franchise, and although I defended our poor parents to the best of my Superdaddy abilities, the sibling rivalry ensued. The good news was through the cell phone text messaging system I found a wonderful way to waste company profits, by doing absolutely nothing but argue with my dear sis, and it went something like this {actually exactly like this as I forwarded all of the messages to me e-mail box here at home}, and I want you to see first hand how EVIL TAFKAP can truly be!!!

The Evil Child - Go ahead tell don & cathy you PRAYED their team lost :P
The Good Child - I already told them you payed off the refs :P""
The Evil Child - Brat pffft im the cuter one theyll believe ME :p
The Good Child - They were my parents first and they know you lie :P
The Evil Child - Pffft i do not MOOOOOM JEREMY IS PICKIN ON ME
The Good Child - Nut uhhh she's a big meanie head daaaad I think I saw her worshipping Satan!!!
The Good Child - Daaaad she has a boyfriend named Spike who hides out the window, and a boyfriend named Bob that hides in her dresser hmpfff :P"""
The Evil Child - DAAAAAD HE WEARS MOMS CLOTHES AND MAKEUP WHEN YOU GO OUT :D, and ROFLMAO that’s not spike he’s sooo last week :D

So at this point I go back to actually working for a bit, and I was unaware of the evil that this woman was truly capable of …

The Evil Child - *sneaks in, puts purple hair dye in jeremys shampoo, runs like hell*
The Good Child - Good thing my stupid sister didn't see me do that to her mouth wash *giggles*
The Evil Child - HEY WHY ARE MY TEETH PURPLE?!? MOOOM, and then sneaks in, puts rubber cement in his vaseline jar & black shoe polish around the lenses of his binoculars
The Good Child – Sneaks out and steals your BOB and sends it to the land of Oz where Joey sells it to Pigmeys, the 17hp motor on the thing scares away the dingos .. lol
The Evil Child - Hey that thing is taller than the pigmies ROFLMAO pokes a pin hole in his blow up doll and steals her stockings, and That was a 24 hp tyvm I saved MONTHS of allowances to buy that baby :P
The Evil Child - Evil laughter fills the mc family home POP goes the blow up doll
The Good Child – NOT EZMARELDA!! I will never love again *pouts*
The Evil Child - Why am I getting doubles on some of the messages?
The Good Child – Because I have been forwarding them all to my email so I can blog them lol Yes but wait til you see it muahahaha
The Evil Child – Dork Still has mine so make sure you post ALL of them and not just my evil ones ROFLMAO
The Good Child – You know how this works Ms Pureheart I will edit them and do whatever I want :P""
The Evil Child - Listen mr daddyman I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE :P
The Good Child – Great another stalker, I have DNA evidence of yours yanno
The Evil Child - Where did you get my dna? Is almost afraid to ask that
who else were you texting with?
The Good Child – From my sheets you know how bad I am at doing laundry lol I did tell you that this is being blogged right?
The Evil Child - Sneaks in and hangs the now deflated & stockingless ezmerelda as a reminder of how low she will stoop :P
The Good Child – Holds a lighter under your Andy Taylor poster and *smirks* And I have all of your Duran Duran albums too baby muahahaha
The Evil Child – Youre the one who admitted to not washing his sheets in over a month :P Ummm NO? ROFLMAO and i want it duly noted that you DID shower and wash your sheets each time i came over
The Evil Child – ANDY? Wrong taylor *sobs* DID YOU EVER LOVE ME? you dont even know which taylor i lust after
The Good Child – I am a single guy, that is a given puh-leeze, and Oh geeze the only time you see John is in Gay Porn puh-leeze

And it actually went on a bit longer but I think I finally have the evidence to show why mom and dad, love me more, and actually I think I also have enough evidence in that to show that we are really from Alabama as well. Aside from that there truly is no reason that anyone has to dread going to work, simply make everyday a holiday, by making your boss thrilled to get rid of you, and every once in a while remind your ex girlfriend that she is lucky to be rid of you too … boy I am tired … long night ;8o)

Other Crap This Weirdo Publishes... The Crow's Nest {The Homepage of Jeremy Crow} Mental Notes & Random Musings {Daily Blog} Mental Rants & Political Rage {For Those That Like His Political Rantings} Mental Imagry & Random Perversion {Adult Stories .. Assume they are rated X} Itching For Coffee {Community Blog} Jeremy Crow on Twitter {For The Easily Amused} Blogaholics Anonymous {E-Mail Blogging Group}

Nothing that was printed here was intended to offend anyone, and if it did, screw ya, you begged for it. If you believe that there are some measures that can be taken to change me, then please feel free to pray for me, and while you are at it yourself, because you read this far, and if you hated every minute of it, then you are an idiot, not me, or the other people who like what I have to say! .. Jeremy

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